Becoming Greater

"So David waxed greater and greater: for the LORD of hosts was with him" (1 Chronicles 11:9)

Now, I know that I go on and on about King David, but look! here is the key, the reason, the explanation to his success: he didn't begin great.

I mean, from what we have David was a good boy, maybe even exceptional for his age and time, but not great. No, great came later. And greater came later still. To me, this means hope for myself. I'm not great, but through the Lord apparently I can wax greater and greater. I mean, even when David had committed his great sin and was seeking forgiveness, he had the spirit of prophecy and music (see Psalms). That's how great he was. And we can be that great too.

This verse about David is echoed about Christ: "the child grew, and waxed strong in spirit, filled with wisdom," (Luke 2:40); "saw that he received not of the fulness at the first, but received grace for grace" (D&C 93:12).

Mortality is a growing experience, for everyone. If we are not where we want to be, then like David, we have to do it through the Lord. In fact, I don't know if anyone great has done it another way. And, if we are amazing already, God can always make us greater.

Temple View

"And they lodged round about the house of God, because the charge was upon them, and the opening thereof every morning pertained to them"(1 Chronicles 9:27)

My husband was home-schooled, him and all his siblings. This was his mom's desire, who hadn't had the best time as a child in public school. Now, his mother, besides home-schooling her children, had another dream: she wanted to live in a house with a view to the temple. For various reasons, this never happened. But, aware of, and sharing their mother's dream, this family gave their "home-school" the name Templeview.

When I was reading 1 Chronicles about the different Levitical duties concerning the temple, I read about how some where to live by the temple and keep watch over it, and was reminded of Templeview. Some of us are physically able to do this, our backyard views opening up to a gorgeous view of a temple of God.

Others of us have to make our homes temples. And yes, that includes cleaning and organizing and not watching bad movies, but it's more than that. Our temple-homes can include genealogy and work for the dead, can be a place of prayer and holy communication, can even have off-key heavenly choirs.

Let's narrow this further: WE can be walking, talking temples. We can be a house for that third member of the Godhead, the Holy Ghost. We can constantly have that "temple-view".

Now, the scripture above said that this was their "charge". Let's take a look at what Moses originally intended for Israel: "And ye shall be unto me a kingdom of priests, and an holy nation"(Exodus 19:6); "would God that all the Lord’s people were prophets" (Numbers 11:29). And that was the idea when Israel was first founded, I would like to think we are able to meet, and succeed, these expectations nowadays.

We are part of Israel. We have temples. Many of us are priests, and prophets, holy men and women. Let us not forget our charge, let us always seek after obtaining that "temple-view"

Genealogy, Again

"So all Israel were reckoned by genealogies" (1 Chronicles 9:1)

So, I've said it a bazillion times, so here goes bazillion-and-one: genealogy is important. Books were devoted to it. Yes, it helped because when the Israelites came back from Babylon it helped to know what tribe you were from, or if you could serve in the temple or not. It helps Jews nowadays who are returning to Israel to know the same thing. Genealogies help gather God's people.

But, let's not make a mistake, an individual is worth more than their ancestors. So, why was Israel "reckoned" by genealogies? Remember, Israel wasn't some city that Abraham started, it was a family. He didn't seek out to set up a church or state, but a family that would grow so big it was its own nation. That was the covenant of Abraham, not that he would help build Zion on earth, but that he would start an eternal family of righteous men and women. Family was the special covenant, genealogy was a record of God keeping His covenant.

Also, let's think for a moment: if family is important, and where we come from is important, then let us go back all the way to our first family, to where we first came from. If we trace our genealogies back to the beginning, we find God. And so we are "reckoned" by our divine ancestry, which yes, implies a divine potential.

If we go all the way back in our genealogies, we find God; if we go all the way forward in our genealogies, we find ourselves.

How Will You React?

The first weekend in October brings General Conference, a gathering and sharing of latter-day prophets and holy women prophesying of Jesus Christ. Through them God may ask us to do something, or through the whisperings of the Spirit answers prays with a call to action.

Either way, we can accept or reject these promptings and instructions. How will we react to the Word?

Let us not be like the Pharisees and other wise men who rejected Jesus: Bible Video-Jesus declares He is the Messiah

Let's prepare now to be humble, and accept that we are before God's eyes, and He has a work for us.

Preparing For Conference

This upcoming weekend is the LDS General Conference, a meeting of prophets like Samuel to speak to the world. It is amazing. Maybe the Bible is hard because it was written for people thousands of years ago, so imagine how the Word of God is if spoken today!

The conference can be seen on the BYU channel, or online at lds.org.

So to prepare to listen to the words of the Lord's prophets, I'll post some past talks and a few quotes that should get up pumped up.

"You show your trust in Him when you listen with the intent to learn and repent and then you go and do whatever He asks. If you trust God enough to listen for His message in every sermon, song, and prayer in this conference, you will find it. And if you then go and do what He would have you do, your power to trust Him will grow, and in time you will be overwhelmed with gratitude to find that He has come to trust you."

~"Trust in God, Then Go and Do" Elder Eyring, October 2010 General Conference

A Time For Singing

"And these are they whom David set over the service of song in the house of the LORD, after that the ark had rest. And they ministered before the dwelling place of the tabernacle of the congregation with singing, until Solomon had built the house of the LORD in Jerusalem: and then they waited on their office according to their order" (1 Chronicles 6:31-32)

David made part of the priestly worship singing? No surprise there, a very David-esque thing to do. And God seemed to be okay with it. In fact, the scriptures that Jesus quoted most often were from Isaiah and the Psalms.

But, when Solomon's temple was built, it appears that the 'service of song' stopped, and the men resumed the normal priesthood administrations of the Levite order. This can be compared to the latter-days and Joseph Smith, to whom God said that baptisms for the dead were okay to perform in rivers until the temple was built. With the temple, ordinances done in rivers was no continued.

From a mortal perspective it looks like God is inconsistent with His instructions. But really, it is just the divine trying to work with imperfect mortals. There is a time for rivers, and a time for temples, a time for singing, and a time for silence. One is not necessarily more right than another, God allows for our limitations and confines, and for our expression of rejoicing.

Maybe this is what God means when He says that His house is a "house of order" (D&C109:8)--that he puts people and priesthood into order, like filing away papers into a folder, organizing them. He can choose to order a different way for different times. This would explain why there are different orders of the priesthood.

Just remember, even though there are places and time of reverence, God also enjoys times of singing. Song can make prophets of us all.

Did God Just Call Me A Prostitute?

"and they transgressed against the God of their fathers, and went a whoring after the gods of the people of the land" (1 Chronicles 5:25)

Israel went after other gods, and so God allowed Assyria to take them away. I've mentioned this before, in the Books of Kings they described it this way: "and sold themselves to do evil" (2 Kings 17:17). Selling ourselves feels like slavery, that to get those things we think will make us happy we are willing to sell our freedom. The writers of Chronicles are adding a new twist to the idea.

What is our relationship with God? We are God's children, His sons and daughters, everyone. But beyond that, to lay claim to that relationship, we enter into a covenant relationship. A covenant relationship is like the marriage commitment: we promise to love Him, only Him, forever. So, when we go after other gods that's an obvious breach of commitment. This could mean other religions, other gods, other beliefs and philosophies that don't worship the Father. It could also be TV, sports, clothes, money--anything that is putting God second, or third, or fourth.

And when we do that, yes, we're whoring ourselves. We are selling ourselves, our time and effort and money, or very souls, for something else. Something that we think will make us happier. And, isn't that usually the case when someone leaves a marriage? They aren't satisfied with their current happiness, and so look for someone else they think can make them happier.

The only problem is, if the one making the relationship not all it can be is you, then no matter who you hitch your wagon too you'll never be happy. But a covenant relationship with God is more than just two people living together, it is a relationship designed to make us better, heal us, make us all we can be. No other relationship, or person, or thing, can save us, can through the burdens of life away. So when we seek after something other than our Father, we are selling ourselves cheap, for someone who doesn't know our real value, who won't be able to release the god within us all.

A Historical Note

"Now the sons of Reuben the firstborn of Israel, (for he was the firstborn; but, forasmuch as he defiled his father’s bed, his birthright was given unto the sons of Joseph the son of Israel: and the genealogy is not to be reckoned after the birthright. For Judah prevailed above his brethren, and of him came the chief bruler; but the birthright was Joseph’s)" (1 Chronicles 5:1-2)

So here is the quick and dirty history. I'm writing this now because 1 Chronicles gives some brief history inbetween genealogies, and I realized that they do this because no one really made the context clear in Kings, which means that I probably didn't either.
First, while Joseph got the birthright, Judah got the rulers. Remember, Ruben lost the first born right because he slept with his dad's concubine. Simeon and Levi, next in line, killed a whole city full of men to avenge their sister's rape, going against the covenant of peace that Jacob had made with them. And remember, Jacob thought that Joseph was dead this while time, so Judah was to receive the birthright (and remember, he was the one who helped save Joseph's life in the first place, so he was an ok guy). But then Joseph wasn't dead and his sons got the birthright. At that same time, Jacob blessed Judah with rulership.
But notice, it was not Ephraim and Manassah that had the priesthood right in the time of judges and kings-again, the right comes by right of righteousness, not birth. But, this is important to know historically, because after Solomon the kingdom split in two: the northern and southern Kingdoms. The southern kingdom is referred to as Judah, even though most of the tribe of Benjamin was there too. And the northern kingdom is called Ephraim in the scriptures, even though there were at least nine other tribes.
This is important to know once we start into the books of prophecy, where they talk about the return of Ephraim.
These two Kingdoms are always working against each other. But then Judah makes a pact with Assyria, and the Assyrians conquor the northern kingdom, take most of the people captive back to their country, and bring in Gentiles to supplement that area. These become the Samaritans, the offspring of these gentiles and the Israelities of the northern kingdom. And those taken away are called the lost ten tribes. But then, not shortly after, the southern kingdom is conquered by the Babylonians, and many are taken captive to Babylon, like the prophet Daniel.
Okay, I think that brings us up to speed. Sorry, wasn't a very 'brief' historical note. But, it does show that God is no respector of persons, and He doesn't care about your lineage, if you're not righteous then you're not getting the spiritual gifts. So why then does God make promises and blessings by families? Maybe, because in a perfect world, families are important. And God wants to work through family order then a kingly or priesthood order.

King David's Sisters

"Whose sisters were Zeruiah, and Abigail. And the sons of Zeruiah; Abishai, and Joab, and Asahel, three" (1 Chronicles 2:16).

In the genealogies of the kings and priests, there is also included the lines of Ishmaelites and Edomites, and even women. Now, Zeruiah, daughter of Jesse and sister to David, had a son named Joab who was David's captain and played a major role in the book of Kings. Yet, his mother and her sister didn't really need to be named--at least, that is what I would have thought of a very male-powered society.

But apparently that culture did think it was important to include these women, sisters to the King David. Notice, Zeruiah's husband is not mentioned. It is her relationship to Jesse and David that is important, not who her husband was.

Now, I love the Book of Mormon, so do not think that I'm in anyway putting it down...but, I have noticed that there is at least on strength that the OT has that the BOM seems to be lacking in: the inclusion of women in the history. The BOM only mentions four women by name (See if you can guess who). The Bible could have done the same, just mentioned that Joab was son of his sister. But they didn't. Whoever compiled the genealogy thought that the woman's name was worth recording, saving for future knowledge.

And the sister's of David are not the only ones mentioned. Tamar and Ruth, any woman of note is recorded by name, and even some women who didn't really do anything. But someone long ago thought that the genealogy wouldn't be complete without women. And that is a biological truth.

So, genealogies are a little boring. But, they show that the OT culture isn't so masculine-focused as maybe some of us thought. They didn't hide their women, or ignore them, even some of the naughty ones. And, I don't want women to be satisfied with this consolation prize of a few notable mentions, but just to point out that women are there, noted by name--a hidden history lingering on the edges of scripture.

David's sisters are not the only ones to get mention. Think of the prophetess Mariam, sister of Moses. Mary and Martha, who have more written about them than their miracle brother Lazarus.

Don't forget the sisters, they're there, but if you don't read closely, you can miss them.

Why Is The OT Soooo Boring?

If you haven't said it yourself, you've heard it: "Why read the Old Testament? It's sooo boring."

And yes, unless endless lists of genealogies excite you, then yeah, boring. Now, let me tell you a story.

I had a religion professor once who talked about the end of the Book of Mormon. I don't know if I remember anything else from that class, but I remember what she said that day. She said that she had an idea of how Moroni felt, alone, the last of his people, protecting a written history of family and culture and language that he would never be able to pass on--no one to relieve the burden of history. This professor was the only member in her family, got baptized when she was a teen, went on a mission, became a professor, never married. She did do a lot of genealogy work. And she was the only one in her family who was even interested. So, here she is, late sixties, a room full of boxes of family history, her history, names and people, with no one to take care of them when she will die. She said that she was planning on giving them to a niece, but who knows, they must just gather dust in some attic for another hundred years. All that effort, never used, never appreciated.

So yeah, genealogies are boring, except to the child who is able to find their grandfather's name, great-great grandfather, back and back down the family tree to the very roots. The OT tells about Christ's family. About our spiritual family.

So you either learn to love the genealogies, or that's the part you practice your speed reading on. Just remember, to someone, that's the history of their family, the record of tombstones that should be visited, and visited often.

Why am I saying all this? Because I'm starting the Book of Chronicles, which is mainly genealogy from Genesis to 2 Kings, mixed with the religious history of the law during the time of the kings. And, I'm going to try to make it not so boring.

Stay tuned.

Women (& Men) Watch This

Here is a talk given by Elder Ballard durning Education Week at BYU which answers questions about gender, women in the LDS Church, doctrine about women, and what we are supposed to do from there. When I listened to this talk I felt complete, like all was said and done and so what I should be doing is going forth to declare the good new of Christ. Elder Ballard doesn't make excuses, and recognizes that he has no answers for somethings, just that it is what God said.

And I kind of like that. In some matters we just have to talk to God, get a confirmation that He's still there and running things, and that whatever He does is because He loves us. So, with that answer, let's go. Elder Ballard is calling us to action.

"I leave you my witness and my testimony that we are in a day and a time when we must stand in unityWe must stand together—men and women, young men and young women, boys and girls. We must stand for the plan of our Heavenly Father. We must defend Him. He is being pushed aside. We cannot stand idly by as members of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints and allow that to continue to happen without being courageous enough to let our voices be heard."

M. Russell Ballard, "Let Us Think Straight"

Above all else brethren, let us think straight.” Last words spoken by Elder Ballard's grandfather who died of leukemia in 1939

Women Are Powerful

"Go ye, inquire of the Lord for me, and for the people, and for all Judah, concerning the words of this book that is found...So Hilkiah the priest, and Ahikam, and Achbor, and Shaphan, and Asahiah, went unto Huldah the prophetess"(2 Kings 22:13-14)

When the King found the book of the law in the temple, where it had been forgotten, he told the priest and other men of high positions that they needed to inquire of the current will of the Lord concerning it. So of course, they went to the prophetess Huldah.

At the end of the day, no matter how much political, theological, or priesthood authority a person has, if they don't have a close relationship with God they have no power. In this way, there are many of us who have the right to power through our faithfulness or righteousness. Even the authority to work that power because of callings or positions or missions. Yet, just because we have access to God's power, doesn't mean that we actually have God's power.

The king and high priest had to go to Huldah, because she was the one who talked with God, who had been listening while all of Israel had been deaf. Huldah had the relationship with God that gave her power, and authority.

So, this isn't really a question of the power of men or women or who's more powerful. Because, it is the person who knows God, who has a relationship with Him, that has power and authority. God is powerful.

So stop being concerned with other people's callings, or the authority to do this or that, and get to know your Father. He is what makes you powerful.

Why Did God Kill Those People?

I hope I'm not beating a dead horse, I've mentioned this several times, but I have to say it again if only because this is a great stumbling block to many people. I'm talking about why did God have Israel exterminate all those people who lived in the land of Canaan? I mean, they were commanded to kill every woman and child, even their livestock in some cases. Why?

I don't know the full answer, and I don't know how statisfying this is for some, but this is the reason that the Lord gives over and over. Manasseh, next king after Hezekiah, is accused of doing "that which was evil in the sight of the Lord, after the abominations of the heathen, whom the Lord cast out before the children of Israel" (2 Kings 21:2). What were these abominations:

"built up again the high places...he reared up alters for Baal, and made a grove" (2 Kings 21:3)--idolatry and the sexual sin that usually accompanied 'groves'

"made his son pass through fire"--the KJV's polite way of saying he sacrificed his own son by burning him to death to false gods

"used enchantments, and dealt with familiar spirits and wizards"--invited influences of false and evil spirits (2 Kings 21:6)

"Manasseh shed innocent blood very much" (2 Kings 21:16)

So, the list is idolatry, sexual sins, human sacrifice of own son, listening to evil spirits, and murder. " and Manasseh seduced them to do more evil than did the nations whom the Lord destroyed before the children of Israel...and hath done wickedly above all that the Amorites did, which were before him" (2 Kings 21:9, 11)

So, two great concerns of most people: 1. Why does God allow evil to happen? 2. Why did God tell Israel to kill all those people? Apparently, there is only so much evil God can handle. The answer to the second question is that He was trying to prevent more evil from happening. And for God, He doesn't see people dying and ceasing to exist, He sees it as moving them to another place where they can't hurt anyone anymore.

I hope to be able to see with God's eyes when the time comes.

Does God Change His Mind?

"I have seen thy tears: behold, I will heal thee" (2 Kings 20:5)

So, here is a funny thing: Hezekiah gets sick, Isaiah is sent to tell him that he will die, Hezekiah prays, and the Lord gives him 15 more years. What? The Lord, through a prophet, decreed that the king was going to die. God didn't say it with a wink and a nugh nugh,'Oh, you're going to die *wink* unless you ask me.'

Now, Hezekiah could have accepted the Lord's word, gotten his things in order and prepared to met his Maker. That would have been a great scripture story. That would have been a wonderful example of humility. And yet...

And yet, the king didn't. And God seemed okay with it. So, does God change His mind?

Now, the Gospel-according-to-me would be that we have to read this as not all word of God is the ultimate will of God. By that I mean that God's word is truth and it is good, but His word is also "Come now, and let us reason together" (Isaiah 1:18). I don't mean that God wants us to debate with Him, but I think He wants a discussion, He wants us to be a part in the determining of our own salvation.

There are many examples of this in scripture, but they are all in similitude of The Great Example of Christ. God's word was that the consequence of sin is damnation (an inability to progress to anything more), and yet Christ became our advocate to come and reason together with the Father, laying out the law and the payment of our sins. Now, God knows this already, so why does He want us, like Christ, to come reason with Him?

Because, I think that this is the only way we can really work together with God, to enter into meaningful discussion about His work (our immortal and eternal salvation) with Him, and so get to know Him better.

I was pulled over by a cop last week and got a ticket, and boy oh boy I do not have kind feelings towards that policeman who handed me that ticket without discussion. If God did that, I don't think I'd like Him very much either. But, God isn't handing us a traffic ticket with a list of what we did wrong, no discussion, no explanations, but He wants the explanations and discussions. So, I come out with the same ticket, the same list of things I did wrong, but I don't hate Him for it. He listened to me, gave suggestions, provided a way to wipe the whole thing clean.

Unlike the cop, God respected me enough to listen to me, even though He already knew what I was going to say, and He has the knowledge of eternities and worlds behind Him. He still listened, and He wanted to. Don't get trapped into the box that there is no talking with God, not to change His word, but to change us, and allow us for a small moment to participate with Christ.

Trusting Is Not Without Its Confirmations

"Now on whom dost thou trust...We trust in the LORD our God" (2 Kings 18:20, 22)

After cycles of wicked, or indifferent, kings of both Judah and Israel we get Hezekiah. Now, not only did he do that "which was right in the sight of LORD, according to all that David his father did" (2 Kings 18:3), and "he clave unto the LORD, and departed not from following him" (2 Kings 18:6), but he also "trusted in the LORD God of Israel" so much that it was written of him that "after him was none like him among all the kings of Judah, nor any that were before him" (2 Kings 18:5). He was one of the great ones.

And yet, not that I would say that he had moments of doubt, but the uncertainties of mortal life allow for confirmation of trust, of revelation. During Hezekiah's reign he rebelled against the king of Assyria, whom a former king of Judah had made alliance with. At that time Assyria was the big thing, the great world power. And Assyria was not happy. The Assyrian army came down, and the captain told all of Judah that if they trusted in the LORD God that they would fail, for no gods had stopped the Assyrians before from conquering other lands, and this God was no different.

Now, not that I think Hezekiah doubted the power of the Lord, but in this moment of confusion and the overwhelming view of an invading army, the King needed the comfort of divine confirmation. So Hezekiah went to the temple and from there called Isaiah, who confirmed again the Lord's will that Jerusalem would not be taken.

But the Assyrian captain came again with a letter, taunting, saying "Let not thy God in whom thou trustiest deceive thee" (2 Kings 19:10). So Hezekiah goes to the temple and spreads out the letter before God, and prays. Isaiah sends word to Hezekiah the answer to his prayer: another confirmation. That night an angel descends upon the Assyrian camp, killing everyone.

In our lives this happens all the time. We have been given assurance from God Himself that a thing is to be, will happen, that He will support us to our success. But, that doesn't mean that voices won't come to discourage us, from evil spirits, from enemies, or even from friends and family. When that happens, it is okay to go again to the Lord to receive another confirmation, another shot of divine strength and reassurance. It is not doubt. We are fallen man, and we need some extra comfort once in a while. It can be faith building. It can lead to revelation. It confirms again that the Lord is God.

(THE) Talk That Changed My Life

"When something is over and done with, when it has been repented of as fully as it can be repented of, when life has moved on as it should and a lot of other wonderfully good things have happened since then, it is not right to go back and open up some ancient wound that the Son of God Himself died trying to heal.

Let people repent. Let people grow. Believe that people can change and improve. Is that faith? Yes! Is that hope? Yes! Is it charity? Yes! Above all, it is charity, the pure love of Christ. If something is buried in the past, leave it buried. Don’t keep going back with your little sand pail and beach shovel to dig it up, wave it around, and then throw it at someone, saying, “Hey! Do you remember this?” Splat!"

There are moments in our lives when certain words, for whatever reason, open the words of revelation, open the grace of the atonement to pour out upon our souls, and life is never the same. We are never the same. One of the most spiritual weekends of my life lead up to this talk by Elder Holland, not only answering my prayers but allowing me to forgive. That forgiveness was the gateway to me healing of very old wounds, ones that I'd never let Christ close.

This talk changed my life. Maybe it'll do something for you.

Elder Holland, BYU Devotional Jan. 2009, "Remember Lot's Wife"

Covenant Against Loneliness

"Until the LORD removed Israel out of his sight, as he had said by all his servants the prophets." (2 Kings 17:23)

Israel had broken its covenant, big time. And had been doing it for a long time. But, worship of other gods had finally progressed until "they caused their sons and daughters to pass through the fire" (2 Kings 17:17)--in other words, they killed their children as burnt sacrifices upon the alters of other gods. Since the days of Moses the Lord had warned against the gods of other countries, and had continually warned His covenant nation against the consequences of breaking that covenant through His prophets.

What does a covenant with God mean? It means that He will never leave us alone, He will always be our God if we are always His people. Without that covenant, we are out of His sight. With the covenant, we are always in His sight, watched and protected. Israel gave up that covenant.

It is not good for man to be alone.

The Helper

"And the Lord was gracious unto them, and had compassion on them, and had respect unto them, because of his covenant with Abraham, Isaac, and Jacob, and would not destroy them, neither cast he them from his presence as yet" (2 Kings 13:23)

I wish God was more of a preventer. I mean, He prevents a lot of bad things from happening. But, really, He's a helper. In 2 Kings 14:26 the Lord sees the "affliction of Israel" because there was no "helper for Israel." And in another war with the king of Syria "the LORD gave Israel a savior" (2 Kings 13:5).

God really wants to help us, He wants to so bad that Jesus was tortured, and died for us. That's something to remember when we're on our knees at night, crying to our God for relief, that that is all He wants to do. And it's funny, but Heavenly Father is only able to help us when we let Him. We have power in that way.

Here's the caveat though, the Lord will only help us in His own way. So in the end, I guess it's not really about us praying for the Lord's help. We keep our covenants and it's guaranteed. What we need to pray for is the wisdom to be humble to the Lord's direction, and the revelation to know it.

I'll pray for that.

What Is It Good For?

"All the money of the dedicated things that is brought into the house of the LORD...Let the priests take it to them...and repair the breaches of the house, wheresoever any breach shall be found" (2 Kings 12:4-5)

So in the last post I talked about getting rid of everything not Christ, and what a happy coincidence, this next chapter describes what we should do with those Christ-things that are left. King Jehoash tells the priests to use money not to continue to furnish the temple with treasure for the Lord, but to use it to repair breaches. And guess what, God was okay with that.

Temples are also houses of refuge, and must be maintained for safety, that no one not worthy can come in to pollute the house.

We are temples. And we have been furnishing ourselves with testimonies, with beautiful prayers and cross-stitched scriptures on pillows. Now, these are not bad things. But, what are they all good for? The Primary Answers--prayer, scriptures, church--are first and foremost for protection. They are how we invite the Holy Spirit and keep out other influences that seek to do us harm. We must use the things of God to protect ourselves, to make certain that there is no chink in our armor, or tear in our robes. Or in others. We can use the things of the Spirit to protect ourselves and others, to maintain a wholeness of being a spiritual creature in Christ. In fact, that appears to be why God gives us these things in the first place. Protected, we can better concentrate on becoming holy, like Him.

Do not let testimonies or faith stagnant as they wait for special occasions or blatant spiritual moments. Every second is a spiritual moment.

"Ye are the salt of the earth: but if the salt have lost his savor, wherewith shall it be salted? it is thenceforth good for nothing" (Matt 5:13)

Who Is On My Side?

"And he lifted up his face to the window, and said, Who is on my side? who?"(2 Kings 9:32)

So, I've noticed a pattern. Remember the book of Judges and how Israel was always fighting outside armies? Well, in 2 Kings the problem is that the enemy is already inside, the destructive seed being the worshipping of golden calves and Baal. But the pattern, the cycle, is that after they start to follow other gods a prophet or king comes and reminds them of their covenant position with the Lord God, and re-covenants with them, and the false priests and followers and destroyed from among the people.

Jehu asks "Who is on my side?" before killing the wicked queen Jezebel.

He then gathers all the priests of Baal, saying, "Search, and look that there be here with you none of the servants of the LORD, but the worshippers of Baal only" (2 Kings 10:23).

Jehoiada the priest "made a covenant between the Lord and the king and the people, that they should be the Lord’s people; between the king also and the people. And all the people of the land went into the house of Baal, and brake it down(2 Kings 11:17-18).

I was thinking about this, and how our lives aren't so different. We "all like sheep have gone astray" (Isaiah 53:6). But that's okay, that's why we have a Shepard, a Savior. That's why we take the sacrament every Sunday. That is the way we remember whose side we are on, we can remember the covenants we have made, and renew them, rededicate ourselves.

But, that's only part of the repentance process. We still need to get ride of those things that would entice us to sin again. If we have built up alters, or chosen friends or heroes that would lead us from Christ then we must put them outside of our lives. For example, my sister had to get rid of Netflix, not because it was evil or anything, but because it enabled her to watch bad movies, ones that started to make her focus on the negative things of life, increasing negative feelings and influences.

So, I guess what I'm trying to say is, do it with me. Together, this Sunday, let's take the sacrament, consciously renew our covenants, remember who's side we're on, and then get rid of everything that doesn't strengthen us in Christ. What destroys us most are those things we invite in through the front door, subtle and persuasive habits and ideas and people. Then, the only thing that will remain is Christ, and He is life and salvation.

I promise, personal happiness will increase.

I Have A Confession...

In case anyone was making the mistake in thinking that I'm perfect in doing what I preach--I'm here to confess.

Lately (I say lately, but I really mean maybe the last five months)I've noticed that my prayers have been way below standard. I used to be really great at prayers, they were constant, and meaningful, and answers came. But, as I've said, I've been struggling lately. I can barely manage to say morning and evening prayers, and when I do they just lack the spiritual power that they used to have. So, looking at it logically, I've done the math: if God hasn't changed, and the Holy Ghost hasn't changed, then the one person in this equation who had to have changed was me!

Now, I don't think there is anything inherently wrong in this, changing, I mean. Life changes, people change, and so relationships change as a result, even the relationship with our Heavenly Father. Which is why I've maybe been so slow to get back to where I was. I was rationalizing, making excuses for myself. Have you ever done that? I would say, Oh, I try better next fast Sunday so that I can start off strong. Things get busy and crazy so then I think, Well, too bad, I'll try better next month.

Well, no more procrastinating. I don't know why I think that making a change always has to be some big thing, that the ritual of fasting and meditation prove to God that I'm serious. I am serious, right now. So I better do it before I lose the courage.

And that's what it really comes down to: fear. Not laziness, but a fear to pray. Since I haven't been praying that well, it means that I haven't been repenting that well. And so, I know that this prayer isn't going to be easy. Me and Heavenly Father have a lot to discuss. I know I'm going to cry, but I also know that He is going to make me feel so much better about myself, and I'm going to come out of it red-eyed and smiling.

Funny that I talked about Primary Answers last week, because it was in Primary that it really hit me hard that I need to improve my prayers. During sharing time, the Primary President shared a quote from a BYU Devotional by Bruce D. Porter that really hit me hard:

"But prayer was never meant to be ordinary: it can be among the most exalted of privileges we enjoy in this mortal sphere."

Prayer was never meant to be ordinary. Wow. I mean, it is the way to commune with deity, God the Father, the Supreme Creator of the universe. No, I guess that it wouldn't be ordinary.

So, this is a confession, and I hope it lets you all know that I'm working on things too. It's easy to say things like love your neighbor and pray everyday and keep the commandments of God: doing them is something else entirely. But, entirely worth it.

(One) Talk that Changed My Life

Want to know God better? This helped me (it goes back to 'God wept'):

Elder Jeffery R. Holland, October 2003 General Conference, 'The Grandeur of God'

This is a must reads/listen.

Quote from the talk: "I bear personal witness this day of a personal, living God, who knows our names, hears and answers prayers, and cherishes us eternally as children of His spirit. I testify that amidst the wondrously complex tasks inherent in the universe, He seeks our individual happiness and safety above all other godly concerns."

Amen brother, amen.

Sacred Things

"and go in, and make him arise up from among his brethren, and carry him to an inner chamber; Then take the box of oil, and pour it on his head, and say, Thus saith the LORD, I have anointed thee king over Israel" (2 Kings 9:2-3)

When prophets have anointed kings, it has been in private, away from others. This isn't a new idea. Anointing, like any priesthood ordinance, is usually done in private. It is something godly, private, something between a man and his God.

Now, Jehu will go out and tell everyone what happened, but they weren't allowed to see the actual ordination. In this way, to the public eye it appears that by small things great things are brought to pass. It is a truth that many of the most miraculous experiences will have very few witnesses: the First Vision, restoration of the priesthood in the latter-days, patriarchal blessings, and temple ordinances. Sacred things are kept private. God is a personal God, and testimony and miracles and ordinations usually come personally.

Why so private? Because, I think, in the end, God doesn't care so much how the onlookers felt and changed, but how you personally felt and changed from the ordinance. If something is for you, from God, then He doesn't want you to be concerned about what everyone else is thinking, how they are judging you in that moment. He wants you to be in the moment, free from other outside influences, to really sink in the experience where you come closest to touching God. Sacred things are private, because in that moment, God is focusing just on you.

The Prophet Wept

"and the man of God wept" (2 Kings 8:11)

Elisha, who had seen Elijah taken into heaven by a fiery chariot, who had raised a boy from the dead, who had prophesied before evil kings and who saw the the heavenly horses and chariots of fire that surround the faithful, wept. Before him stood a man who was going to do evil to many innocents. And Elisha wept.

"And Hazael said, Why weepeth my lord? And he answered, Because I know the evil that thou wilt do unto the children of Israel: their strong holds wilt thou set on fire, and their young men wilt thou slay with the sword, and wilt dash their children, and rip up their women with child." (2 Kings 8:12)

This is not the first time that a prophet of God has wept. And we shouldn't be too surprised, but God Himself weeps:

"Jesus wept" (John 11:35)

"And it came to pass that the God of heaven looked upon the residue of the people, and he wept" (Moses 7:28)

Christ wept for His friend Lazarus, for the mourning sisters, Mary and Martha. God wept because, as a result of their wickedness, the people would "suffer" (Moses 7:37).

From His prophet, what can I learn about God? I learn that the God who weeps is in Old and New Testaments, in all the scriptures. Why? Because He doesn't want to see us suffer. Elisha wept because the choices of one wicked man would lead to the suffering of many. Just because God does not end our suffering immediately, or always prevent suffering, He is not immune to it, He is not without feeling.

In this, I guess that God follows His own commandment to mourn with those that mourn. And He can follow that notion exactly, for the atonement gave Jesus the perfect ability to mourn with us. Now, Elisha could have killed that man, God has been known to command that from time to time. But you know what else? That man, Hazael, he heard the prophecy, he say the prophet cry, he could have changed--but didn't.

After all is said and done, I hope that I never give God cause to cry because of my choices. I hope that I never cause suffering for His children. I hope though, that I can be like God, like Elisha, and mourn for those who have cause to mourn.

Open Your Eyes, And See

"And when the servant of the man of God was risen early, and gone forth, behold, an host compassed the city both with horses and chariots. And his servant said unto him, Alas, my master! how shall we do?

And he answered, Fear not: for they that be with us are more than they that be with them.

And Elisha prayed, and said, Lord, I pray thee, open his eyes, that he may see. And the Lord opened the eyes of the young man; and he saw: and, behold, the mountain was full of horses and chariots of fire round about Elisha." (2 Kings 6: 15-17)

Open our eyes, and see.

We aren't perfect, we can't see everything. Just like we can't see ultraviolet light and any color outside of the rainbow, there are things in this universe, all around us, that we just can't see. But, that doesn't mean that they aren't there. Or, that they have power.

And if our eyes are opened? We would see that we are not alone. We would see victory. We would see the hosts of heaven at our aid. We would see the very real evidence of God's love, of just how possible it is to overcome. If we aren't seeing these things, then we need to stop closing our eyes. So many times I have heard people say that they don't want to see visions, or miracles, because they don't want the added responsibilities. But that also means that they don't get the added strength and power.

And if we want to see, then we must do like Elisha, and pray for the power and wisdom of God to open our eyes.

When I was little, playing hide-and-seek, I remember thinking that if I couldn't see them, then they couldn't see me. But, we're not children anymore. We don't have to be afraid. For they that are with us are more than they that be with them.

Elder Eyring gives us some advice on how to open our minds through the gospel of Christ in his April 1999 General Conference Talk, 'The Power of Teaching Doctrine'

The Primary Answers

"if the prophet had bid thee do some agreat thing, wouldest thou not have done it? how much rather then, when he saith to thee, Wash, and be clean? (2 Kings 5:13)

This is the story of Naaman, who had leprosy and was told to bathe in the Jordan river seven times to be healed. He was mad, expecting a prophet of God to do something miraculous and showy, something worthy of the high station of Naaman. Now, we all laugh at how silly Naaman was, how stiff-necked and petulant. No, we say, we would never do that. Now, let me paint a scenario for you, dear reader:

At church it's Sunday School, or the Gospel Doctrine Class, and the teacher asks: How do we receive answers to prayers? or How do we come closer to God? or How do we overcome temptation. And then there is that silence, we all know it, as everyone sits there, thinking 'Duh.' And then there is the brave soul who can't stand the quiet a second longer, raises their hand, and says, "The primary answers."

Sounding familiar?

For those who don't know, the Primary Answers are what the church (and word of God) teach starting in Primary, the children's sunday school class. The Primary Answers are usually some form of this: pray, read scriptures, go to church. Not only are they easy things to do, but they are beyond basic knowledge for those who have grown up in an LDS church. And so many times 'Primary Answer' is said with bored exasperation.

But, why are prayer, scriptures, and church the primary answers? Because they are the fundamental answers. Want to know God? Read the scriptures (that's what I'm doing ;), talk to Him in prayer, go to His house. Want to overcome weaknesses? Primary Answers. Want to know the mysteries of God? Primary Answers. Answers so easy that sometimes they actually become hard to do.

We should think ourselves better than Naaman. Sometimes I too want a big miracle, want some hard task worthy of epics. But, that's the whole news of the gospel, right, that it's easy. You come unto Christ (or the prophet Elisha), you receive instruction (bathe in a river), and become clean and like a child ("and his flesh came again like unto the flesh of a little child, and he was clean" 2 Kings 5:14).

Yeah, Primary Answers are taught to children. But when will we learn, we are all children in the sight of God, our Father. All we have to do is bathe, and be clean, and believe. Then, we may stand with Naaman, and say:

"Behold, now I know that there is no God in all the earth, but in Israel...[I] will henceforth offer neither burt offering nor sacrifice unto other gods, but unto the LORD" (2 Kings 5:15, 17).

Through obedience and repentance Naaman came to "know" God. Hmm, maybe I should try that more...here I come Primary Answers.

I Will Not Leave Thee

"As the LORD liveth, and as thy soul liveth, I will not leave thee" (2 Kings 4:30)

Does the above scripture sound familiar? It should. It was all I could write about in my last post. But, this time, it is not Elisha talking to Elijah, but a woman talking to Elisha. (For the record, this unnamed woman added a room to her and her husband's house so that the prophet could have a place to stay every time he traveled by.) This woman's child got sick and died. She traveled all the way to mount Carmel to entreat the prophet, who recognized "her afar off" (2 Kings 4:25), they were pretty close. Now, Elisha, even more than Elijah, has many recorded miracles: from feeding thousands and multiplying food, to raising the dead. Again, this should sound familiar. These were the kinds of miracles that Jesus performed durning His mortal ministry.

Now, Elisha sends his servant to heal the dead child, and that is when this faithful mother says these words:

"As the LORD liveth, and as thy soul liveth, I will not leave thee. And he arose, and followed her." (2 Kings 4:30)

In the last post, and in this one, I've looked at Elisha as a foreshadow of the Christ. I'm going to continue that. The woman said that she would not leave Elisha. Why? Because she knew that he had the power to bring her son back from the dead. Isn't that why we follow Christ? Because we know that physically and spiritually He will bring us back from the dead to reunite with our loved ones? He has this power. So why would we ever leave Him? Why would we ever follow anyone else? I'll let you in on a little secret. When I was younger, I had a time where I felt spiritually dead. But while in that 'grave' Jesus was always there. And He lifted me back up until I was alive again. That's when I first really started to follow Christ.

And the amazing thing in this story: Elisha followed her. There's a symmetry in all things. Christ followed us to the grave, to sin and anguish. We call that the atonement, where he descended below all things, following us so "that he may know according to the flesh how to succor his people according to their infirmities" (Alma 7:12). After that, how can we not follow Him, how could we ever leave Him? He followed us into our darkest depths, that we might be able to follow Him to the heights of heaven.

"Then said Jesus unto the twelve, Will ye also go away? Then Simon Peter answered him, Lord, to whom shall we go? thou hast the words of eternal life" (John 6:67-68)

The Male Ruth: Elisha

"As the LORD liveth, and as thy soul liveth, I will not leave thee" (2 Kings 2:2)

Remember when Elijah was lonely and heard the still small voice? Part of God's comfort, and instruction, is to anoint Elisha to be a prophet. The Lord didn't just comfort Elijah with the knowledge that he wasn't alone, but actually gave him a companion: "he arose, and went after Elijah, and ministered unto him" (1 Kings 19:21). And while I don't know if they were together 100% of the time, it is apparent that they were companions and that Elisha had great respect and desire to follow Elijah.

Then, it's almost time for Elijah to be taken into heaven, and apparently all the sons of the prophets know and keep telling Elisha, who, (to paraphrase)says, I know, be quiet. Elijah himself keeps traveling to different cities, at each place telling Elisha: "Tarry here, I pray thee; for the LORD hath sent me to Beth-el" (2 Kings 2:2). Elijah says this a total of three times, also being sent to Jericho and Jordan. At all three places the sons of the prophets come to tell Elisha that Elijah is going to be leaving seen, taken by the Lord. And still, each time, Elisha answers: "As the LORD liveth, and as thy soul liveth, I will not leave thee" (2 Kings 2:2, 4, 6). It's like the story of Ruth, but with a man.

At first, thinking about this male Ruth, I thought of how I should be more like Elisha and follow God. Sometimes God is very present in my life, and in those moments there is always the though in the back of my mind: soon He will not be as involved, won't be quite so close as He is right now, He has other things to do. And I think that's true, but what is also true is that I can follow Him to where He is going next, I don't have to leave Him just because He has other things to do. He doesn't always have to be by my side, but I can always be next to Him.

And then I thought, no, that's not it at all. I've got it backwards.

The Lord is Elisha, and He refuses to leave us. How often have I said to the Lord: I have to go do this or that, you don't have to come, I can do it on my own. And how often has He answered back: no, as I live, I won't leave you. Why? Because that's the atonement. We can't be alone, because in that garden Christ already went everywhere with us, never left us for a moment. No, He is not going to leave. That's the good news of the gospel, right? That's the promise, the covenant, that He will never forsake us, and we will never leave Him. That's what it's all about.

You Are Precious 2

"This is a paradox of man: compared to God, man is nothing; yet we are everything to God."

Elder Uchtdorf "You Matter to Him" General Conference October 2011

YOU are Precious

"therefore let my life now be precious in thy sight" (2 Kings 1:14)

Ahaziah, son of Ahab, gets sick. Elijah prophesies that he will die. Ahaziah sends a company of fifty to fetch Elijah down from the mountain. Fire comes down and consumes the fifty and their captain. Another company of fifty is sent, and they too are consumed.

Now, it's important to take a quick look at WHO is doing what in this interchange. The captains call Elijah a "man of God," yet commands him to "come down." Elijah says "If I be a man of God, let fire come down from heaven, and consume thee and thy fifty," and it was so (2 Kings 1:9-10). What is happening is that the captain is standing in for the person of Ahaziah, and Elijah is standing in for God. This is an interchange between God and the wicked king of Israel.

After these two companies are killed, something amazing happens. The third captain sent comes up the mountain and "and fell on his knees before Elijah, and besought him,and said unto him, O man of God, I pray thee, let my life, and the life of these fifty thy servants, be precious in thy sight" (2 Kings 1:13). Bold and humbling, this man kneels and admits that they are servants in the eyes of God, but-but!-he recognizes that in God's eyes these humble servants are precious.

Think about this, how counter-intutivite it is. God had killed a hundred men before this man as if they were nothing, as if to chastise them for having the audacity to make commands of God's representative, and therefore as if they did it to God Himself. It would make sense then for the third captain to make the argument, 'please don't kill us, you are mighty and we are weak, spare us, apply mercy.' Instead, his argument is 'if you recognize that we are desirable and of worth, then don't kill us.' What is that? Where is this coming from?

Now, I'm going to take some liberty here, but I venture to guess that this third captain knew the Lord. He knew that in the Lord's sight, men were precious, they were worthy of mercy and salvation from political necessities and temporal destruction. This is not something that he would have learned from the other two captains, apparently he was working based off of knowledge learned somewhere, somewhen, else. He gambled that men were precious in the sight of the Lord, and he won that gamble.

The third captain was right. He was speaking to a prophet of the great Jehovah, Jesus, the God who thought that man was so precious that He was going to condescend, suffer, bleed, die and live again just for them. Yes, we are precious, and Jehovah knows that more than anyone.

Maybe when we come to God, pleading for salvation from whatever haunts us, we can fall on our knees and use this same argument: Lord, we are thy servants, but save me, am I not precious in thy sight? This plea is placing a verbal claim on the atonement of Christ, who bought us with a price, who gave us worth, because we already had worth and a precious price worthy of a God's death.

And apparently an unnamed captain in ancient Israel knew this about God, knew how God saw us-and so maybe had an idea of what God will do for us. We have no excuse then to not know how precious we are.

Don't Be A Hater

"And Jehoshaphat said, Is there not here a prophet of the LORD besides, that we might enquire of him?" (1 Kings 22:7)

God uses prophets. In 1 Kings 22 there is a question about who is a real prophet of the Lord, who knows the truth. But, that is only Jehoshaphat's, king of Judah, question. Jehoshaphat and Ahab are about to do battle with Syria together, against that same king that Ahab let go free, and the king of Judah wants prophetic confirmation before they do anything. So Ahab calls all his prophets, who appear to speak in the name of the Lord, but, as Jehoshaphat right discerns, are not real prophets and asks for a prophet of the God of Israel. Why? He wants to know the truth. But, Ahab is looking for something else from his prophets:

"There is yet one man, Micaiah the son of Imlah, by whom we may enquire of the LORD: but I hate him; for he doth not prophesy good concerning me, but evil." (1 Kings 22:8)

Wow, hate, that's a strong word, but I think Ahab means it. Why are the ancient prophets killed, hunted, persecuted? Because they spoke the truth, and truth can be "hard" to the guilty, "more than we are able to bear" (1 Nephi 16:1). I get that. We are imperfect. It's hard to be living your life then have someone come and tell you that God wants you to change, or rebukes and chastises, telling you that the things you like are bad and shouldn't really like them. Change is hard. And, we don't like to think bad of ourselves or our behavior. So yes, sometimes we hate the truth, because it's trying to change our carefully constructed reality.

All the time in Japan, when I was on my mission, I would ask the question: what if there was a God, and He is who we say He is? Honestly, most said that it wouldn't matter to them. I asked: what if there was a way you could find out that God exists? And they would say that they didn't want to know. Because then they would have to change, and change is hard. I'm not saying that it's easy. And I'm not saying that Ahab is being anything else than being extremely human.

But maybe we should expect more of ourselves. Maybe we should expect more of our lives. Ahab ignored the prophets, and was killed, his blood licked up by dogs. But, his life could have been so much more. Yes, the prophets speak hard words, but let us not hate the truth. The truth can set us free from the chains of this world, can enlighten us to higher awareness and connection, can free us with confidence of strength over the seemingly strong things of this world.

I guess that what I'm trying to say, to myself as well, is don't hide from knowledge. Knowledge, when applied, is power. And, God wants to make us powerful. I have heard, so many times, even members in the church say that they don't want to see angels or have visions, because they don't want the responsibility. I get that, responsibility is hard. But with it comes strength.

"Just give it up. Surrender your will to Him. Unconditionally. Withhold nothing. Turn it all over to Him; all of your desires, wishes, dreams and hopes. Be true and faithful in your head and in your heart, not just in your behavior. Trust in Him. Trust Him who knows all things. Trust Him who has all power. Trust Him whose love for you is perfect. Trust Him, who alone suffered, paid and atoned for your sins, and for your weaknesses as well. Trust Him that He will make of you, immeasurably more, than what you will ever, ever, in all eternity, make of yourself. He will create of you a masterpiece. You will create of you only a smudge. You will create an ordinary man. He will create a God."~'The 4th Missionary' by Lawrence E. Corbridge

God Forgives Ahab. Really?

"behold, I will deliver it into thine hand this day; and thou shalt know that I am the LORD" (1 Kings 20:13)

So I'm reading 1 Kings 20-21, and I'm just saying, the Lord has more mercy for King Ahab than I could muster. The guy is worshipping idols, his wife Jezebel is leading an active campaign against the Lord, killing his prophets, as well as providing false witnesses to kill Naboth so that Ahab can have his vineyard, because apparently the king needs more land. And, with all that, the Lord has not completely given up on Ahab and Israel. The above verse is where the Syrian army comes against Ahab, and a prophet comes to tell him that the Lord is going to deliver the enemy wholly into his hand, as a sign that God is God. Ahab wins the battle and the enemy retreats. Then again, another prophet comes and says:

"Because the Syrians have said, The LORD is God of the hills, but he is not God of the valleys, therefore will I deliver all this great multitude into thine hand, and ye shall know that I am the LORD" (1 Kings 20:28)

The Syrians didn't get it. And they had no special reason to understand, their understanding of gods was like the Greek pantheon, powerful but limited in geography and omniscience. The Lord was teaching Ahab who He is, the God of the whole earth, everything, the hills and valleys. This is God telling Ahab, 'I haven't completely left Israel, I'm keeping my end of the covenant, and this is who I AM. Know me.' But in the end, Ahab commits a King Saul sin, in not obeying the Lord exactly, to kill the king of Israel's enemies, when the Lord has commanded it.

Now, I know. Killing someone is awful. How could the Lord not only command this, but get disappointed when the king fails to kill the other king? Remember, this is an invading army into the land that God covenanted to Abraham's seed. God also said that He would be their protection, but He cannot protect them if they keep letting go those who will invade them again, killing even more. God is not saying that the Syrian king is sinful or evil, just that he is trying to kill Israelites and take their land, something that God covenanted would not happen if Israel was faithful. And, the Lord could have let the enemy army come in and kill Ahab and take the kingdom, which I wouldn't be surprised at, seeing how antagonistic Ahab is against the Lord, and his own people. Eventually, this Syrian king will be the death of Ahab. But the Lord is patient.

Surprisingly, it is only after the false witnesses and stoning of the innocent Naboth for his land, that Elijah is finally commanded to go to Ahab and tell his that for this sin of murder (breaking the commandments of murder, false witness, and covetness) the Lord says the kingdom will be taken from him and his posterity. The Lord described Ahab's sins this way: "because thou hast sold thyself to work evil in the sight of the LORD" (1 Kings 21:20,25). In the end, the only thing we really own is our souls, our intelligence, our ability to choose right and wrong. Ahab sold his soul for Naboth's land, for victory and wealth. Sin puts Ahab, and us, out of the protection of justice, and the covering of the atonement. He has sold himself in the sense that now Ahab is under the power of death and sin, he is not free, but is bound, damned, cannot progress, but is subject to the devil and his angels. (See Jacob 3:11) Ahab has sold himself into slavery to buy a few material things. But, there is a way out.

Believe it or not, Ahab repents. Christ has bought us all, but we cannot claim His power and mercy unless we repent. And, Ahab repents in sackcloth and ashes: "Seet how Ahab humbelth himself before me? because he humbleth himself before me, I will not bring evil in his days: but in his son's days will I bring the evil upon his house" (1 Kings 21:29, and fyi his son will deserve it). Honestly, I'm shocked at how quickly the Lord forgave Ahab. And, I have to trust the Lord's word that there was some true repentance, otherwise I would call it a sham. How quickly though!

If the Lord forgives Ahab this quickly, then how quickly will He forgive me? I'm not being prideful or anything, but I'm pretty certain I don't have the same mass of sins that Ahab had. How quick! God must have just been waiting to forgive this whole time. How quick the Lord was to turn away His declaration of punishment for Ahab. Now, as we will see, Ahab still has a few more things he's going to do, but wow, really, the mercy of our God! I'm just blown away that the God of the OT was so quick to forgive, and how quickly I still cannot forgive Ahab. Maybe, at the end of this all, what I've learned is not to judge others. I'm more harsh than the God of Israel. I need to work on that.

If God is God

"How long halt ye between two opinions? if the LORD be God, follow him: but if Baal, then follow him" (1 Kings 18:21)

This is what Elijah asked before the contest with the priests of Baal, in front of many Israelites. After Baal was unable to consume the sacrifice, and the God of Israel sent fire from heaven, those there bowed down and acknowledged the Lord as God. But it is Elijah's initial question that I love.

You have to decide. If the God of the Bible is the real God-the God over all people and nations, the creator of humanity-then follow Him. If not, don't. There are two questions, two things that we as humans have to figure out, and then act upon. First, is God God?

The Book of Mormon is a tool to help figure this out. LDS doctrine would urge a seeker of truth to ask God Himself if He is God, going straight to the source. This can be intimidating. What if God answers? If He answers, then we have a responsibility, as Elijah put it, to follow Him.

And that's really the second question: if God is God, do I want to follow Him? Elijah would say that Him being God alone means YES, and I agree to that to a certain extent. But, this is an important commitment. If you don't know who God is, then find out. The scriptures are God's interactions with people. They are a record of who He is. You can also, again, ask Him. You can try the experiment, obey the commandments and see what happens.

Now, don't take my word for it, try it out yourself. But, I will say that God is the epitome of charity and love and tender mercy towards all humanity. And, there is power in that. Love made a God condescend to suffer for our sins, to die, and the power of that love overcame death and hell. It overcomes darkness and loneliness, it creates hope and confidence. God is God, and Jesus saved me, pulled me back from the edge, and is taking me home to my Father. Yes, God is God, and I follow Him. And since I've made that decision I've never looked back. It hasn't always been easy, or fun. But it's true, and I can't deny that on a whim.

So, if anyone is out there waiting, stuck between "two opinions," I urge you to become unstuck. Study it out, ask, meditate, earnestly seek out the true answer, not just the answer you want. This God is Love, but He's no walk in the park. He is a God that changes you, and change can be uncomfortable sometimes. He will raise you up. And, if you find out that God is God, don't hesitate, follow Him. Fire will come down from heaven. A still small voice will whisper comfort, bringing you out of the cave to stand upon a mountain: You are not alone, I have work for you.

A Hundred Prophets

"Now, Obadiah feared the LORD greatly: For it was so, when Jezebel cut off the prophets of the LORD, that Obadiah took an hundred prophets, and hid them by fifty in a cave, and fed them with bread and water" (1 Kings 18:3-4)

I could spend this post talking about how great a guy Obadiah was, and I probably should. He worked for Ahab, but feared the Lord more than the king and Jezebel. He recognized Elijah and his authority, and even though he recognized the great peril in Elijah's request of him, also recognized that in the end he would obey the Lord despite it all. I could talk about how we are the same, living in the world but not of the world. That not all of Israel had fallen, that great government leaders were still faithful, that there were a hundred prophets, men of God, still at work. I could talk about prophets, that there is not one, but many at a time. But, I'm not going to. I'm tempted, but I'm not going to. Instead, I'm going to talk about loneliness.

In the next several chapters, Elijah is going to make the statement: "I, even I only, remain a prophet of the LORD" (1 Kings 18:22; 19:10, 14). Elijah feels alone. After the face-off with the priests of Baal where God consumes Elijah's sacrifice with fire from heaven, Elijah goes out into the wilderness, and "he requested for himself that he might die; and said, It is enough; now, O LORD, take away my life" (1 Kings 19: 4).

Elijah had just talked to Obadiah, a man of faith in a wicked government. A man who saved alive 100 other prophets. But, maybe Elijah felt that these prophets were nothing, for he was commanded to go about publicly, while they hid in caves. Elijah held to contest with the priests of Baal, saw fire from heaven consume the sacrifice, turn the hearts of all the people there back to the Lord, killed the pagan priests, and was touched by an angel of the Lord. And he felt alone. Sometimes, despite experiences to the contrary, we also feel alone. We feel that we do more than others, that the Lord has asked enough of us. And prophets are not perfect, they feel the same.

In this spirit of loneliness, desiring even death, an angel comes to give food and strength to Elijah, "because the journey is too great for thee," alone, I would add (1 Kings 19:7). And so, with divine aid, Elijah journeys to mount Horeb, or mount Sinai.

When Elijah gets to the mountain of the Lord, he is in a cave when the Lord asks: "What does thou here, Elijah?" And Elijah answers, paraphrasing, "I have been a faithful servant of thee, Lord, in this time of idolatry. Israel has not kept the covenant, has destroyed thy alters and thy prophets, and seek to kill me. I am alone." (1 Kings 19:9-10)

God then asks Elijah to come out of the cave and stand upon the mountainside. Then came wind, and an earthquake, and a fire, but the Lord was not in those. But after all these, the Lord came in a still small voice. And, hearing the voice, Elijah come out of the cave, and God asks the same quesiton again. And Elijah answers in the same way.

Again, the Lord's question: what are you doing here? Elijah's answer: I am alone, faithful servant of thee. Same question, same answer, so why does God go through the whole fire thing?

The Lord had just accomplished a powerful miracle of fire from heaven. Now, it is a still small miracle. The Lord is a God of power, and a God of the small things of the soul, and emotional help. Elijah needed time for meditation. To be reminded of the different facets of God. To go to the mountain of the Lord. There, God answers Elijah by giving him more responsibility, as well as answering his qustion of loneliness: "Yet I have left me seven thousand in Israel, all the knees which have not bowed unto Baal" (1 Kings 19:18). There are seven thousand faithful in Israel, 100 of them prophets. No Elijah, you are not alone.

In doing the work of the Lord we are never alone. The only one who was ever alone was Christ while performing the atonement: "And I looked, and there was none to help; and I wondered, that there was none to uphold" (Isaiah 63:5). But, when we look, there are those who uphold. We have parents and friends and church leaders and home teachers, prophets and apostles, Christ Himself as our attendant. If any of those fail, there are backups. And at least Jesus will never fail us. But, there are moments when we feel that we have had enough, that we are alone. Then, I pray that we may do like Elijah, and go to the holy places of the Lord, and there be wrapped in the still small voice. And that voice, no matter what it says, is proof that we are not alone. Never, ever, alone.

God took the time to reassure Elijah in his moment of weakness, He will do the same for us. He did do the same for us. In the atonement, where Christ was alone, He made it so that we would never be alone. His voice whispers to our souls with power and comfort: Never, ever, alone.

Faith, Round 2

"And he [Jesus] said, Verily I say unto you, No prophet is accepted in his own country. But I tell you a truth, many widows were in Israel in the days of Elias [Elijah], when the heaven was shut up three years and six months, when great famine was throughout all the land; But unto none of them was Elias sent, save unto Sarepta, a city of Sidon, unto a woman that was a widow" (Luke 4:24-26)

The story of Elijah and the widow of Sidon is a beautiful story of faith and obedience, at least, at first. Soon it turns into sorrow and questioning. But I can't blame the widow her sorrow and test of faith, for I know that my spiritual health is in constant flux. I have more in common with her than not.

Elijah, and all the prophets of the Lord, are having a hard time in both Judah and Israel, where the kings have followed after other gods. Elijah is then commanded to go to a gentile city, to a gentile woman and her son. Sometimes we wonder why Israel was so special, that they got the law and the prophets. We forget these times of Elijah, and Jonah, when the prophets of Israel go out and find great faith. So, Elijah meets the woman and asks for food. Her response: "I have not a cake, but an handful of meal in a barrel, and a little oil in a cruse: and, behold, I am gathering two sticks, that I may go in and dress it for me and my son, that we may eat it, and die" (1 Kings 17:12). She was preparing for death.

But Elijah asks her to give him the food anyways, and for her obedience she barrel of meal and oil would remain until the end of the famine. And it was so. What faith of this widow! She only had enough food to make a last meal, and she gave it to a stranger. She must have been preparing for this day, when she and her son would eat their last food, and die, for a long time. She must have planned and thought and prayed about it for a while, agonizing, but able to do nothing else. And when asked, she obeyed. If she was wrong, they would die like planned, but if she was right, they would have life.

Quick, notice the conditions of the miracle: the meal and oil would only last until it started to rain again, signaling the end of the famine. The miracle was a blessing with a time limit-think Cinderella and midnight. I have been blessed so many times, with the gift of tongues, or confidence, or peace, or understanding, but only for a time. When the immediate needs are fulfilled, the gifts and miracles often go away. But, that does not make them any less of a miracles; that does not make them any less worthy of trying to obtain them. But yes, these things do not last forever. Only Christ Jesus is the bread of life. Obtain faith in Christ, not in a miracle.

Elder Holland, "A Handful of Meal and a Little Oil," General Conference April 1996: Elder Holland speaks for the widow

Then, came round 2 of faith for the widow, and for Elijah. Now that they had been temporarily saved, the widow's son got sick, and died. Was God going to save them, only to allow them to die the next moment? Trials do not come alone, but in pairs, and threesome, in hordes. But so does the grace of God, if we allow it. The widow, when her son is dead, asks "What have I to do with thee, O thou man of God? art thou come unto me to call my sin to remembrance, and to slay my son?" (1 Kings 17:18) We don't know what sin the widow had committed. But I understand what she meant. I have never remembered my sins more than when I was in the 2011 Sendai earthquake, and I had never repented more. I felt my own mortality, and couldn't help but wonder if the end of my life would be because of my mistakes and sins. And I worked so hard in Sendai. Why would the Lord have granted me all those miracles, all those moments of growth and revelation, if He was going to send a tsunami, and so send me somewhere else.

Even Elijah appears to have these questions. He takes the boy into his own room, into his own bed, asks why this evil has happened, and "stretched himself upon the child three times, and cried unto the LORD, and said, O LORD my God, I pray thee, let this child's soul come into him again" (1 Kings 17:21). And the child's soul came back, and he lived, and Elijah took him down to his mother, saying, "See, thy son liveth". And she answered, "Now by this I know that thou art a man of God, and that the word of the LORD in thy mouth is truth" (1 Kings 17:23-24).

The barrel of unending meal was not enough to convert her. We are the same. We have miracles that should convince us of the truth, and power, of God. But, we're waiting for something bigger. No, God must deliver us from a bigger crisis before we will believe with full heart. But, He already has. Like Elijah, Christ has saved us all from death. We will die, and our mothers will cry, but Jesus will come to our mothers and say, "See, thy son liveth." He has already done this. The greatest miracle of our lives has already been accomplished. The atonement, for us, a preemptive miracle. And we will live.

Now, I maybe criticized the widow unfairly. At the end of the day, faith, either hers or Elijah's, was sufficient that the dead son was made alive again. And, it produced a spiritual rebirth in the woman. Yes, we should all have greater faith. But if I learned anything from Elijah and the widow and the son, it's this: God doesn't expect our faith to be perfect, 100% of the time. He knows that we are imperfect. And, despite our imperfections and moments of weakness and doubt, He still provides miracles. He still saves us. Wether or not we accept Christ, Christ still took upon Himself our sins, and afflictions, and pains. He does it anyway. And we live.

God Respects YOU

Have you ever heard the question, if there is a God, why does He allow evil to hurt and maim the innocent? Have you ever asked that question yourself? It is a hard question, one that probably has a hard answer. But, even being hard, they are true. Jesus asked his disciples after many were offended at His doctrine and followed Him no more, "Will ye also go away? Then Simon Peter answered him, Lord, to whom shall we go? thou hast the words of eternal life" (John 6:67-68). I only mention that scripture so we keep it in mind as we read the OT, and as we come closer to God, to learn more about Him, who He is. Because, at the end of the day, God has eternal life, no other has it.

Now, back to the question. There are many answers of why bad things happen, or why God allows bad things to happen. Here I am only proposing one idea among the many answers that I believe are right. How about this answer: God respects you. He respects you, He respects me, He respects every person who has been or ever will be born on this planet. The scriptures usually describe this as, God is no respecter of persons (meaning that all are equal, and none are above another in the sight of the Lord). I would amend this to God respects every person. God gave us agency, the right to choose for ourselves.

To Adam and Eve, after giving commandments in the garden of Eden said: "nevertheless, thou mayest choose for thyself, for it is given unto thee" (Moses 3:17). Yes, this life is a time of proving, to prove that we will choose God every time. But He gave us that choice. Why? So that we could fail? Yes. If we choose something other than God, that is our right, it has been given to us. Now, agency does not eliminate the consequences. The only way to obtain eternal life is through Christ, so if you don't choose Jesus, then we are not choosing eternal life. But, that is our choice.

God would not send a soul to earth if they did not have the ability to be exalted, through Christ Jesus. We all have potential. We proved it in heaven, before we came here. And we may a choice there too, and we choose God, now we just have to choose Him again. Why doesn't God take away our agency, that the wicked can have no power to hurt the good and innocent and righteous? Because even God loves the wicked. And part of having love for someone means having respect. God will accept their decision at the end of the day. If they did not choose Him, ok, but He is not going to choose them either.

God knows the future, He knows what we are going to choose. So why prove us? Maybe, this is an opportunity to prove ourselves. Growing up I always fancied myself as strong, unmovable, a pillar. But, there have been times, especailly after the earthquake in Japan, when I realized that I wasn't. I was weak. I found out that I wasn't the giant I thought I was. I proved myself wrong. And so I decided to change. I proved that I wasn't strong, but I knew that God was, He was the strongest thing ever. And I could hold on to Him. I found out that I may fail myself, but God wouldn't fail me. Face it, we are here to prove if we really are all that we claim to be. To prove that we have what it takes for exaltation. And if we don't (and none of us do) then we can prove that God has what it takes. We just need to choose Him.

God respects us enough to let us make our own decisions. Maybe He respects us too much. He is trying to turn His children into adults. And it makes me sad, to think that I fail His respect so often. But then, maybe that should give me strength. For some reason, and I have no idea why, God respects me. I must have done something. All of us must have done something. He loves us all, and there is respect in that.

Now, you're asking yourself, what does this have to do with the OT and bickering between the kings of Israel and Judah? God didn't want kings in the first place. But, not that He gave in to Israel's request, He respected their decision, even if it was the wrong one. The consequences are always there. But, the freedom to choose has been given to to us. Remember, that freedom was given because God respects you. We are children of the Most High, and our potential is as wide as eternity. We are no better than Israel and Judah, going back and forth between righteousness and wickedness. But, God loved them and respected them just as He does me and you. Do we allow for that same respect to each other? To our Father?

And if all that I have said has a grain of truth in it, what does that tell us about God, who He is?

The Beginning of the End

"And Judah did evil in the sight of the LORD, and they provoked him to jealousy with their sins which they had committed, above all that their fathers had done" (1 Kings 14:22)

Both Rehoboam and Jeroboam sinned, and made Israel and Judah sin in building up idols (see 1 Kings 14:15-24). And perhaps Judah did even worse, for their sins were "above all that their fathers had done," and "they did according to all the abominations of the nations which the LORD had cast out before the children of Israel" (1 Kings 14:24). Leviticus 20:23-24 makes it clear that the sins of those nations included a host of sexual sins, from incest to beastality. Yes, God did want His covenant people casting Him aside for false gods, but in those days the "high places" and "groves" were accompanied by sexual sin as part of the pagan rites. I'm not going to go into it, but believe me, they just weren't worshipping trees. And, those were the religions that didn't do human sacrifice. And here Judah was, doing it all.

It has been what, a only a few generations since David and Solomon, since the temple, the glory of the God of Israel? How quick they were to fall. But then, I do that too. I'll have a spiritual experience, a real coming-to-Jesus-moment, and for a few months I'll be higher than I ever have been. But then I get caught up in shopping, and the love of material things. Of career and culture. And, if only for a short time, I forget my God. Or, at least, I don't remember Him as I should. That is why repentance is such a vital part of God's plan, and why God loves a repentant man.

Again, David is mentioned in this chapter: "And rent the kingdom away from the house of David, and gave it to thee [Jeroboam]: and yet thou hast not been as my servant David, who kept my commandments, and who followed me with all his heart, to do only that which was right in mine eyes" (1 Kings 14:8). God is going to take away Jeroboam's kingdom from his son the way that David's kingdom was taken from his grandson, yet Jeroboam is nothing like David. David "followed [God] with all his heart," while Jeroboam "hast cast [God] behind [his] back" (1 Kings 14:9). Just another example that we cannot assume that what when the same bad things happen to two people it is because they committed the same sin, or even had sin at all. Now, Jeroboam's son dies much like David and Bathsheba's first son dies. Here, it is made very clear that the son was already sick and unlikely that God struck him down. Ahijah the prophet makes it clear that while Jeroboam's son will not be miraculously healed, "in him [the son] there is found some good thing toward the LORD God of Israel in the house of Jeroboam" (1 Kings 14:13).

The son of Jeroboam was a "good thing" in the sight of the Lord. This is mortality, and it ends, for everybody. And, it is really sad. Beyond grief. But, it does not mean that someone sinned, that they were not good or accepted in the Lord's sight. In fact, Jeroboam's son teaches us that God sees death a different than we do. Death is not always a punishment. Jeroboam's son was counted unto his father as a "good thing towards the Lord." So, as the next chapters reveal wicked kings and idolatrous people, and death and destruction come, we need not assume that all are bad. Or that the Lord kills indiscriminately. He knows who He is taking home.

It is the beginning of the end for Israel. But for the individual citizens, for those who are a "good thing" in the Lord, death and civil unrest is only the beginning of their eternity. Just because Jeroboam makes "high places" do not mean that everyone worshipped there. There is individual agency. And yes, apparently a nation can commit a crime as a whole, but it does not mean that every person is stained with the blood of that generation. Keeping that in mind, let's have mercy in our judgement towards the ancient Israelites as we read further.

OT Good Samaritans

"And he laid his carcase in his own grave; and they mourned over him, saying, Alas, my brother!" (1 Kings 13:30)

This is a chapter about two men, a man of God and a prophet, who both do very Christ-like things. The man of God prophesies that the alters of King Jeroboam will be destroyed, and when Jeroboam points at the man that he might be taken and killed, his hand dries up. Now, the king asks the man of God: "Intreat now the face of the LORD thy God, and pray for me, that my hand may be restored me again" (1 Kings 13:6). The man of God does, and the king's hand is restored. Not only is this a sign that God has not utterly forsaken Jeroboam, that he has time to repent, but doesn't, but it reminds me of Gethsemane. When Judas and the guards come to arrest Jesus, Peter cuts off the ear of one of the men. And Jesus heals him. Like that healing, this healing in the OT is not a sign of the injured person's faith, but a sign of the mercy of God. The man of God could have laughed at the king's request, for he had no right to the mercy of God. But, he prayed for him anyways, and God was merciful.

Jeroboam was quick to abandon the Lord God, but God was not so quick to abandon Jeroboam. And if the Lord is that patient with such a man, then imagine His patience with us.

In the end, the man of God is tested, and ultimately disobeys the commandment that he was given not to turn back, or to eat or drink. He is killed by a lion, his body cast to the wayside. The prophet goes and finds the man's body, even though the lion is still there. "And the prophet took up the carcase of the man of God, and laid it upon the ass, and brought it back: and the old prophet came into the city, to mourn and to bury him"(1 Kings 13:29). Compare this with the story of the Good Samaritan, finding a man half dead, placing him upon his own beast to take him to an inn, to care for him. The man of God is fully dead, consequences of disobedience. Yet, the prophet takes care of his body, mourning him, being buried with him, because the man of God did prophesy, and did do good in his life. Even if we make mistakes unto our own destruction, our good deeds will not be forgotten.

Let's take another look. Suppose the prophet is Christ, and we are the man of God. Christ proves us (see JST 1 Kings 13:18, footnote b), and because we are imperfect sinners, we will ultimately die. But, Christ will take our bodies upon His own beast, and will bury us in His own sepulcher, will cry over us, "Alas, my brother!" This is the OT, Christ has not yet been resurrected. But, if the righteous lay down in Christ's sepulcher, to "lay my bones beside his bones,"(1 Kings 13:31) then when Christ rises they will rise with Him.

The man of God, who was from Judah, was coming back down from "the high places which are in the cities of Samaria" (1 Kings 13:32).